The Offer I Couldn’t Accept
Recently, I was offered a part-time job that I usually would have been excited to accept. However, I had to turn it down because of my previous one-year commitment to being a part-time National Park Service ranger.
I was offered a “dream job” opportunity, which I’d have loved. But because I’d said “Yes” to a previous opportunity, I had to say “No” to a great job.
It’s not that I don’t like my park ranger role; I enjoy greeting and educating visitors about our park, and I enjoy teaching by leading tours. I enjoy wearing a uniform and the status and respect people have for rangers. But, I am sad and disappointed that I had to turn down a great opportunity due to my previous commitment to this job.
Every “Yes” Has a Hidden “No”
This brought home the point to me: when you say yes to something, you automatically say no to other things, even things you don’t know about when you commit. I’d read that many times before, but this was the first time I understood it practically.
I’ve been thinking for a while that I’d like to end my two-day-a-week obligation, but it’s a commitment that other people are counting on, so I can’t just walk away from it. However, I would have if it were a project I had control of and could have ended. And if the opportunity presents itself, I’ll likely end my commitment earlier instead of continuing the entire year. There are other things I feel are more important for me to be doing with my limited time.
Quitting Doesn’t Mean Failing
Often, we start a project that we have an interest in and start working on it. At some point, our interest shifts, or the outcome isn’t what we’d hoped for. When you’re in that situation, it’s OK to kill it so you can try something different.
It doesn’t mean you wasted all your time, you’re a failure, or you’re a bad person. It just means it didn’t work out. As Buddhist monk Heamin Sunim wrote, “Knowing the right time to give up is a form of wisdom. Giving up does not mean the end, but the beginning of a new path.” When Things Don’t Go Your Way: Zen Wisdom for Difficult Times.
How do you know when it’s time to kill a project?
• You’re procrastinating working on it. It may indicate that you’re no longer interested in it, or that you realize it’s not developing in the way you hoped, or that you don’t have the needed skills to complete it. Sometimes procrastination is our mind’s way of saying, “I don’t want to do this anymore.”
• The purpose no longer exists. Maybe you started the project for a reason that no longer exists, like growth, curiosity, or a cause.
• You’re only doing it to please others. Ask: Would I still be doing this if no one else knew or cared? While there’s value in serving others, a project built solely on fear of disappointing others may not be sustainable.
• The opportunity cost has become too high. What am I giving up to keep doing this—and is it worth it? Sometimes, we pay too high a price in missed opportunities or misaligned time.
Celebrate What You’ve Gained
You likely learned new skills by working on this project, skills that you may be able to use in the future. Perhaps you’ve learned more about using WordPress or improved your workflow or writing skills.
You can celebrate that you followed your curiosity and learned some new skills and then move on from there. Even if the result was not what you hoped for, you learned what you didn’t want to do, and that’s valuable.
Stay Open—But Still Commit
One warning: We don’t want to overcompensate by being afraid to commit to anything because we want to keep all our options open. We’d never get anything significant done if we were unwilling to take on any project. We must understand our limitations and accept them.
So go ahead and try new projects and start new endeavors. But don’t be afraid to kill them if you feel like it’s time to try something else.
AI Note: I wrote this blog post myself, using my own words for the initial draft. I used AI only to suggest headlines, section headings, and improvements to the text.
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